I think. I hope. I know. I absolutely, positively know for sure. Ohmygod, I am just crazy, because this is totally wrong and not ever going to happen.
How can I go from completely sure to no way José in seconds? Sometimes doubt doesn’t creep in, but rather rushes in like a linebacker. (Is that right? Do linebackers rush or only block? Should I change it to just football player…or something else entirely? Oh, forget it. Um, go Bears!)
When I am overcome by doubt, how do I know if it’s just fake fear or real caution? Is my brain trying to tell me something or just denying me a good thing? When I doubt something or someone, am I really just doubting myself? Maybe it’s just that I don’t have confidence in my feelings and decisions. Nor in my deservedness.
OK, brain, here’s the deal, only doubt things when they are bad for me. Or someone else. (Well, like really, really bad for someone else. If it’s good for me and just a little bad for someone else, fuck ’em.) Otherwise, just let me have faith and trust. If the first guess works, don’t bother having a second one. Get it? Got it. Good!